Wednesday, May 09, 2007

6 months ago...

was the worst day of my life. I know people overuse that term but it really was the worst day of my life when my dad died. And I realize I am going to have more losses in my life. Its made me think of mortality and all that crap.

Anyway today for some reason was a bad day. I miss him all the time but some days (Like today) it hits me again and the pain is so fresh just like that awful day last november. I made it worse by going through some old old photos in the basement that I havent been able to face until now. Maybe thats a good sign that I was able to do that. Still cant watch any videos. I watched an interview with Katherine Hepburn last night on TMC and she was saying that she was never able to watch LOOK WHOS COMING TO DINNER because it was the last film she and Spencer Tracy made together, he died a few months after the filming. I am no Katherine Hepburn but I sure understood what she was saying.



Blogger Lynda said...

I still have my days to. You just have to roll with it. It happens sometimes.

I hope tomorrow is better.

9:43 PM  
Blogger Fantastagirl said...

I don't think you made it worse by looking at those photos...a bad day is a bad day - Hope that you have a good day tomorrow, and there is nothing wrong with missing remembering him, you are keeping him alive.

9:44 PM  
Blogger doggybloggy said...

we are the same this what I am like?

8:05 AM  
Blogger Shelli said...

I can relate. You never stop grieving, but it gets a little easier to bear eventually.


BOTB vote, too. :)

9:20 AM  
Anonymous Dawn said...

I do understand how you're feeling. Sounds like there's a whole lot of love in your memories. I hope when you remember them that you smile and cherish the great memories and love that you had.

1:01 PM  
Blogger poody said...

I have the same days too my friend.(((hugs))) They will never be gone as long as we keep remembering. I had just such a day yesterday.

3:16 PM  
Blogger Beth said...

aw.. I wish I had some wise advice to give you, but I'm all out at the moment. My grandma dies in 1986 and I will see a woman in the store who reminds me of her, and I want to just run up to her and hug her. I miss her smell, her laugh, her cooking, her garden....everything about her.

3:53 PM  
Blogger Mel said...

Thanks guys, I am better today. Poody I swear we are linked in some cosmic way, we both had these emotions yesterday.

Beth, I had that happen for the first time in the grocery store, this old man looked alot like my dad. I bet he wondered why I was staring at him.

Doggy I dont know if you are like me, but I am not usually this whiney I promise!

5:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thankfully, every relative of mine who's passed away I don't miss. They were ALL scum.

4:40 PM  

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