I remember the days when I could make up my bed every morningbut these days its an excerise in futility. My little dogs burrow and my big dogs, well they just wad everything up to make a nest. You might think that I own these dogs, but I think they own me...and my bed.

In other news, Ernesto left us all wet but nothing major. I am tired, is it friday yet?

Later

Little Miss SunshineSmall town hickville decided to play this movie Finally and I went and saw it sunday. What a great movie! I really think it may be the best movie I've seen this year. Its not for everyone though I guess. Its more Character driven than anything and my what characters in this family. The teenager Paul Dana, was so good. That kid is going places!

And I have 2 movie quotes for today from this movie:

"Everybody pretend to be normal"

and my personal Favorite

"Again with the Fucking Chicken!"

I recommend LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE and hey any movie with Mary Lynn Raskjub in it scores a hit with me. Wish her part had been bigger, I am missing Chloe and Jack Bauer!

Later

Ding dong the witch is dead.......

not really, but my evil boss from the bowels of hell is no longer working there. I feel like all the munchkins, celebrating the demise of tyrany. I feel like the world is just a lighter place. The stress of wondering when she would pounce is gone. New boss is sooo much better, she knows you dont have to belittle people to make them work. She is, however, much smarter than other boss and could find this blog easily if she tried hard enough so I may not be blogging much about work after this.

Later

Please help settle this debate.

The issue is the coffee cups and drinking glasses in the kitchen cabinet. Hubby says you should turn them upside down, that it is more hygenic that way. I must have grown up in a slovenly household though, my mom did not turn the glasses upside down, and neither one of my grandmothers did. So who is right? You know, maybe its just a Canadian thing vs a southern thing? Its no biggie, I can start putting things upside down but I just wonder if I am a slob? I wonder what Monk's kitchen cabinets look like?

The hick town finally decided to show Little Miss Sunshine at the movies, so I am going to see that today, as I mull over the important drinking glass question.

Later

What the hell is that on her chin????

So I take back what I said about Lukas on Rockstar, he seems to be a decent person. But Dilana showed her true colors this week. She came across as a full blown huge BITCH, and she didnt help herself ANY in the compettion. But really what is that on her chin? I get its some sort of an adornment, and I guess I just too old and unhip but good lord its hideous! She is so talented but what an ungracious attitude.

In spite of my emmotional week, work was sooooo nice with the evil boss from Hell on vacation. I dread monday when she comes back. Lots of changes were made, things got done. My department ( well right now its just me LOL but I get help soon) had a record week! I dread mondays anyway but this one is going to be interesting.

Finally called my parents about what the doc said, also told the kids but all i told them was I was going to get a biopsy. I told my parents the full blown version. I am better mentally anyway. It just sucks but hey, what can you do?

Anyway its the WEEKEND!!!!!!! Lets all sleep late mmmkay?

Later

When a doctor calls you on monday and says he wants to see you on Tuesday, its usually not good news.

So I wasnt expecting good news but the reality of my situation hit me like a ton a bricks yesterday. I will never get better, pretty much its all downhill from here. He stopped the Gammo treatments since they were not helping. He threw alot of terminology at me and I was pretty confused, the blur between this "could happen" and this "will happen". He is not sure I guess. Hr brought up a heart transplant again...NOT that again. My heart is doing fine on the meds but he seems to think this neuropathy caused the heart failure not the other way around. HUH? Wow. I remember being the hospital 3 1/2 years ago and me telling them there was something wrong with my feet and why where they numb and they just blew it off. They were busy with heart failure not feet issues. But it was the start of this. He has scheduled a punch biopsy for late september so he can get a better sense of that the damage is to my nerves. I need to call my parents and I am putting that off, If I am not going to get better, dad wont either. And the worst part is my kids I guess are at risk for this too. I was wallowing in self pity yesterday. I am better today as long as I dont have to talk about it. Bad things happen to people every day. Look at Lynda's sister, never smoked a day and she is taken from her family lung cancer! So I am not special or even unique. But I think It will be a while before I can stop feeling sorry for myself. Yes I am having a pity party. My hubby has been so sweet thank GOD for him, I dont know how I could handle this alone.

Another Subject PLEASE! Lukas on Rockstar has GOT to go. I know I know lots of people like him but he bores me and he looks ridiculous. I loved Dilana's outfit last night but does anyone else think she is trying to be Stevie Nicks??? The outfit and the twirling. I dont blame her I wish I could pull off that look. Stevie rules in my book.

Later

Yes its monday and that makes it a sucky day.

I am on a rant today. Just because. I am a woman with no hormones in almost a month, fear me! Actually I think I am doing ok, I havent killed anyone yet or lost my temper. Maybe life with no hormones can be ok. I keep telling myself that anyway.

I want to see the movie Little Miss Sunshine BUT NOOOOOOOOOOOOO but sucky small town is not playing it! I even checking with the neighboring towns thinking I will drive a little out of the way but they arent showing it either!!!!grrrrrrrrrr. There was another movie I really wanted to see recently (cant remember what it was though) that no one was showing. here. They didnt show the Al Gore movie and I was mad about that. Lets face it Al Gore is HOT!!! LOL OK Global warming is hot.

Well its time to go to work so I want to rant about working. Why can I not stay at home? Oh I know because I like to eat and I like my HBO and I like my cell phone even if I get alarming text messages from my children., I like spending more for Tim Hortons coffee. Life without Tims...well its unimaginable. Trust me I did 5 days with no Tims in the Hospital and I was not a happy camper.

Please leave me some love today...I do love the comments. Come on.... you can do it!

Later

I will never be the same again because of modern technology...

last night I recieved a Text message from my daughter. Not unusal, as I have unlimited text messaging and she is a teenager and this is thier means of communication. This text however, was not meant for me. She THOUGHT she sent it to her boyfriend. Lets just say its was disturbing for a mother to read, it was pretty graphic. I felt like Pheobe on Friends when she first saw Monica and Chandler making out... "MY EYES!!!! MY EYES!!!!!!!!!!" So what did I do? I handled it the only way I knew how. She is an adult so she can do adult things even if it disturbs me. SO I called her and laughed and laughed about it!! She didnt think it was funny at all...she said "Lets not ever speak of this again" to which I replied "OH NO you will be living this one for a long time" She is just lucky she did not accidently send to her dad instead of me. I have no doubt that he would kick her out if he read it. He doesnt realize he so controlling he is driving to her such behavior. Oh well, thats another rant I would rather not get into.

Jeopardy is recovering fast from her "incident"...its difficult for her to walk but she does. She met me at the door yesterday, but she can barely wag her tail. Her back legs are splayed now, the only way I describe it is they look like a baby calf or colt when they stand for the first time. Her head is cocked to one side and I think her hearing may have been affected some. But she was able to go up and down the basement stairs last night. Hubby said she was like me coming up those stairs....I hate those stairs and I dont go down there unless I have to but the washer/dryer is down there so I cant avoid it all together. I do worry when our dogs get older. the only way to get them outside involves steps.

Anyway I have errands to run for Hubby's business today and I may go to see Little Miss Sunshine or Snakes on a plane. Do you know they have Snakes on a plane jewelry??? Its has bling...I gotta get me one of these!!! LOL I have a birthday coming up soon, maybe I will treat myself for not dying this year.

later

I was freaking out last night..

Came home and Jeopardy did not meet me at the door with the other dogs. I knew something was wrong. She in the back bedroom on a dog bed and was laying in her own poop and pee. NOT like her! She couldnt get up. She was acting like she had a stroke, but evidently true strokes are rare in dogs. NO they think she has Canine Vestibular disease.

Hubby also was freaking out, this is his "heart dog"...he loves her more than me I think. She is our first greyhound and she is the best girl. Lately she has been very clingy.

Anyway, and good thoughts sent her way would be more than appreciated. She is able to get up now but loses her balance when she tries to walk.

I wish I didnt have to go to work today!

Later

Treatment day for me.

Today I get to go back to the hospital for my monthly treatment. I dont want to go, I have had my fill of the hospital lately but know this will help me. I have felt lousy this week, the doc said I would before each treatment...like it wears off? My dad's new doctor tells him he has what I have, not Lou Gehrigs thank God! Seems like this is heriditary, thanks dad! Also the blood clot is probably heridetary too from him.

Work has been actually great this week, my evil spawned from the depths of hell boss is on "vacation", and we really dont know what is going but it kinda looks like her reign of terror is over. I hope so, its been nioce and nonstressful this week.

The pic is Wylie, I think she has a big head in this pic, its a silly one!

Later

NO NO NO NO it cant be monday already?????!!!!!!!!!! ARGGGGGGG!

Well as you can tell I am really looking forward to today. Work has been surreal and bizarre, I really dont know what to expect today. I am not worried for my job anymore but there is some shit going down and I just dont handle the drama well.

On the bright side, Hubby's last night was last night. Well not his LAST night but the last for a while anyway. Its strange, I miss him so much but I have gotten so used to being alone that I start to resent him when he is here and takes over stuff. Like the TV remote LOL.

Deuce and Melvin decided to chase a cat that got in our fence and while the cat got away (thank goodness) they had it cornered and got scratched up. Deuce got an infection from the scratches and his face was swollen! I wish I had gotten a picture, it was pretty funny looking... a greyhound with a swollen face. I was too scared to get pictures though. He is all better now on antibotics, but he didnt learn anything, this morning he chased a squirrel.

Later

Yes this picture is a rerun. Hey, its summertime., Everything is reruns!New mom and the Blog had requested I re post Kornfan's picture with the medals he won in las Vegas last year. So everyone will have to suffer, LOL I am a proud mom, I cannot help it! He hasnt been to any competitions yet this year, although he tells me there are 2 coming up. They decided not to go back to Vegas this year, there was some sort of an altercation with another team, sounds like drama to me. Anyway, my son has decided he wants to teach his craft for a living, does that pay well??? At least he has a goal. Do any of you know who Royce Gracie is? I didnt, so I did a google search. He was in town last week and Kornfan got to be trained my him and also went to dinner with him. Kornfan was soooooooooo excited about all this. When I talked to him about it I was still in the hospital with no computer and no idea who this guy was. Now I know it was a big thing, thanks to google and the internet (thanks Al Gore!!)

We got paid and the overdraft is paid so financial life is better at our house. yeah! Today I have to drive to town 45 minutes away to pick up a computer for hubby to fix. His business is really taking off, he only uses word of mouth but this person tells that person and ect and now everyone is calling. I have been having to make calls for him and running these kinds of errands. The problem is, all the money made is going back into the business and I am not seeing any of it! Before he got his business License, he was repairing and upgrading computers and the money was ours, it wasnt much but it really was nice. Now I dont see any cash yet I am doing more and so is he. grrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

I am still feeling pretty good. I am scheduled for the IVIG treatment Wendsday and I called the Neurologist to see if I can still take that now that I am on the blood thinner but I havent heard back yet. Oh my bloodwork was a comedy of errors I will save that story for another post.

Later

Yeah for Fridays woot!!!!!!!!

Things are weird at my work...rumors are swirling, and what passes for management is so secretive about stuff. Its like super spy film or something. When I was in the hospital a co worker called to tell me they hired a girl and then they interviewed 2 people. Being the paraniod person I am, I assumed they were just tired of me being sick so much and were replacing me. Of course everyone else thinks the same thing...that they are being replaced. It didnt bother me much though, funny I have never been fired and always thought it would be the worst thing but now I dont feel that way. Anyway, I dont think they are replacing me after being back at work but I still dont know what is going on. I am just going in and sitting in my cubicle and putting in my hours. Today is a 1/2 day yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I get off early but I have to stay in town to get my bloodwork done at 3:30. I will have to get blood drawn every week now because of the Coumadin. What fun!

Later

zzzzzzzzzzzzz back to work..UGH!

ok so the doc said I could back to work today. I dont feel ready, I feel fine but I am not mentally ready for this. I overslept too, so it looks like I will be late. Co workers have called me to tell they hired people while I was gone...I am confused as to whether its 2 or 3 people, I dont know what is going on.

I went to the GYN yesterday because I am having "female" issues with being off my hormones. He said that there is no safe hormone I can take now that I have a history a blood clots. Great. So I may be bitchier than usual and I would like to just apologize in advance in case I get offensive LOL. He did say that its possible that my menapause symptoms could have eased off some...its been 4 years now since I was post menapausal. So I am hoping he is right. So far its not too bad, no hot flashes yet and I havent felt irrational. Keep fingers crossed!

They kicked 2 people off Rockstar last night...it was time for Jill to go, but I dont understand why they are keeping Zarhara ( or whatever her name is), maybe just as a novelty to see what she is going to wear??? Bradley got kicked off Runway, I will miss him. He was an awful designer compared to the others but he was so amusing and didnt take himself seriously.

ARGG ok I gotta go to work now. Oh..pic is 2 of my little ones. The little black ones dances sideways when she is excited so we call her MC Hammer, its so cute! Cant touch this.

Later

Can you say Broke??

Got home from the hospital and found out we are $200 in overdraft!! Ack. Dont blame me, I have not been able to spend any money while I was in the hospital! It was that Frigging Harley personal property taxes of $400...I told you the day Hubby bought that thing is the day we went broke. Anyway I need some groceries and I am trying to see how can I swing that. Luckily we dont need many groceries as we were pretty stocked up already. But I am addicted to my coffee creamer and I will NOT be denied LOL. Yes I have a thing for the coffee mate Vanilla Caramel creamer. They do not even sell it in my small town for some reason, I have to drive 20 minutes to the next town over (where I normally work) to get it. Now figure in the cost of gas and you will see this little ceamer addiction I have is quite costly LOL. Luckily Hubby and I both get paid this week so things will be better on the money front soon.

Speaking of broke, doesnt Britney look kinda like a homeless streetwalker in this picture???? I KNOW she can afford nice clothes, what is WRONG with her???? She goes out looking like this and then gets upset when people make fun of her?? How can you not??? Please Britney get some help!

later

Project Runway - Episode 5 Preview - Workroom

I am addicted to this show. Here is the preview of this weeks show for anyone interested.

5 days in the hospital...frankly I would have rather been in Vegas.

Went to the ER Wendsday night, it was very surreal. Doc telling me I could die from the blood clot, while the lady in the next bed was in the ER because she was "despressed and just couldnt get out of bed in the morning". Now while I know that depression is a serious medical issue, I was a being told I might die while she was sobbing (very loud) that she hated her job. It was strange. Anyway they sent her home and admitted me at like 2 am. I was on complete bedrest (I was not even allowed to get up to to the bathroom) until yesterday. I was BORED and scared at the same time! Fri am the doc comes in and says my heart is racing and that means the blood clot has moved....ack! He really scared me that day too. But all is ok now, my blood is really thin now. Do you know thet give you shots in your stomache for this?????? It wasnt bad though, I dont mind shots. I hate IVs though and I had those too.

They seem to think its genetically related since my dad had clots when he was in his 40s too. I am on coudmadin and they took my estrogen away from me so I will be bitchy. But at least I am here..........

I watched alot of TV and read 6 books. I have lost 10 lbs, the food was awful and the coumadin is making my appetite nonexistent...which is not a bad thing!!! I feel so bad I couldnt update my blog. Since Hubby doesnt know about this blog, I couldnt ask him to do it. I would rather him not know about this anyway.

Anyway, thats how my week was. I missed my parents 50th anniversary party that was saturday in Virginia but my kids went. My parents loved it even though I wasnt there. I paid for 1/2 of it (with my brother) so it really sucks I couldnt go. But like I said before I am here so I will not complain.

Later

FUCK NOW WHAT????????????

It turns out the swelling and pain in my leg is a blood clot, they did an ultrasound. I called my family doc and she said to go to the ER. So I am waiting for hubby to get home to take me. "IF it werent for bad luck I'd have no luck at all" Oh maybe good news, the lupus doc is not convinced I have lupus sp she is running more tests. So maybe I dodged that bullet.


Later

Apologies to Pam and Tommy opps I mean Pam and Kid Rock.

It turns out those werent the pictures from the actual ceremony, thank GOD! Pam wore a dress!! It was turtle necked and covered everything! haha....just kidding when has she ever worn a turtle neck? It was a nice but not much of one from what I see of the pictures. BUT now Kid...(what is her name now Mrs Rock? Mrs Kid? I guess its Mrs Ritchie) Kid outdid himself in plain white hanes Tshirt...hey they should do a commercial with Kevin Bacon...Look who we've got our hanes on now.............. I am not complaining though, at least he had a shirt of some kind on.


Tommy lee on Rock Star last night....it turns out he cant drum with a shirt on. I can kinda see that though, when you move as much as he does who needs those restrictions? No matter what you say about the contestants, Tommy is having a blast every night and his enthusiam is contagious. Other things about him may be contagious too LOL! Kidding!!!! I liked Storm the best last night although I really dont want to like her. I was too lazy to get outta bed and vote for her though. That Lukass Guy reminds me of the monkey boy from Land of the lost...check out the pics. Is it just me??? I think he just looks fugging silly.


Today I have my appointment at the artheritis Clinic to see the Lupus Doctor. I am hoping for some answers. My left leg is swollen all the way up and its hard to bend it at all. Its also sore, like a bruise but its not bruised. I dunno what the hell that is all about!!!! I talked to the Neurologist yesterday and told him I felt like I was worse and he said to wait until after my booster IVIG treatment and then see how I feel.

Happy Hump day out there!

Later

The tackiest wedding ever...this one is SURE to last!

words escape me on this one. am I the only one that thinks Kid Rock always needs a shower? He always looks dirty to me. These people have money...they could have used it to to...oh I dunno........buy some clothes?????????

later